Thursday, January 20, 2005

Shattered

My heart cries out
A strong front I put on
My stupidity from then till now
All in vain as it came to naught


You told me to give you time.
Time I gave you freely,
Never asked for anything in return.
Now that she is coming back,
What next?
For me to wait in futile,
While you be with her?
Or to give up,
so as to protect myself


Protecting myself,
Something I have always done
Yet this time round,
Could never be determined enough to.
To do it & stick to it for always.
And seek the peace I desperately need.
The peace of not having you,
And the comfort that comes from accepting it.


I have to accept it,
and to face it.
The sooner I do,
the better it is.
A drinking partner I need,
Yet none in sight.
With no time to spare,
Nor a person to confide in.
What have I gotten myself into?


Fate dealt me you,
And you dealt me hard blows.
My heart is torn to bits
In anguish my muffled cries
I long to sob,
but the lump in my throat is held.

Release all these torment from within,
Please.

Tuesday, January 18, 2005

A woman is what I am

Woman of desires,
I do not know what I want
Uncertain if I made the right decision
of waiting for the one I cry for
Or should I turn my head away,
And run elsewhere.


Woman of needs,
Non-devoid of emotions.
I have my times of insecurity,
Hungry for assurance and the human touch.


Woman of questions,
Do you really mean the words you say?
Or are you just saying them to console me
To prevent me from getting hurt?


Woman of no patience,
Yet I am willing to wait.
Irony this is,
but what does it say?
It ain in your face,
But yes, I feel for you
More than what I dare admit.