Suddenly realised again that love is about being able to sacrifice for the other person, and not about expecting the other to sacrifice for me. With this, I realised that many of my relationships had been had in vain, that I was too caught up with being pampered that I forgot about sacrificing. Give, I did, but I never sacrifice. Love is about sacrifice, about forgoing stuff, even life itself perhaps. Sadly, I never felt this for my previous partners. With this realization, I feel as though a burden has been added onto me.
Realizing my mistakes is one thing. Being able to walk away from them stronger is another. Already, people are looking and judging on my love life. "Flirt! Flippant about relationships!" they say. I dun blame them. I made mistakes and I accept it. What I am unsure about is whether I can fight the fear: Fear of stigma, and the disbelief that I will be serious about my next relationship. How about my next partner? Can she accept my past, and have the faith in me, that I am serious about her? I know what my mistake is and I have learnt not to let it happen again. But, will I have the chance to love again, and show that I am serious this time round, that I know how to love once more.
Will you give me a chance?
No comments:
Post a Comment